Wednesday, December 25, 2019

Today is my birthday - 74 - childhood memories

Went to sleep on the red couch watching movies. One film ran into another. Awoke at daylight with a dream. I was adopting a bronze-colored baby boy and I wondered how he would make out in my world of mostly white people.

Finally turned off my laptop and lay in total silence.

So important! You let your thoughts run free and see where they go. I spose it's a kind of meditation.

Sarah just woke up and wished me Happy Birthday.

What I really wanted was for Mommy and Daddy to wish me happy birthday.

We lived at 2929 Glenmore Road, Shaker Heights 22, Ohio.

Maybe Susan Diener would call me, too. We were love/hate friends. Her parents were Blanche and Stanley, long gone. She was born bc her older brother had encephalitis, I think, and died.

After I woke up I started unloading the dishwasher, Frigidaire, as I said yesterday. The mugs n measuring cups n everything in there were so clean they looked new.

Freddie Jacobs, Susan Held, Judy Glicksberg, who told me she had an internal rhythm inside her, Julie Grodin, whose father was a psychoanalyst, Mrs Evelyn Hess, my favorite teacher - she thought my dad was a rabbi - Mary Truby, of course, Mark Schulman, who gave me a box of Forever Yours for my birthday. I kept them buried in the snow so they wouldn't melt and so my little sisters wouldn't find them.

They did.

Skippy the turtle, my ant farm, The World Book encyclopedia, Zaner Blowser terrible pens, a Schaefer pen, Jane Eyre, one of my favorite books, Quo Vadis by Henryk Sienkavicz (am just guessing the spelling), The Robe by Lloyd Douglas.

I went thru a Christian-reading period and thought about converting.

My hands are absolutely freezing now. I used Lantus last night but my BP is still high - 191. I made two trays of ice cubes this morning. Ice cubes used to be a tiny chocolate candy.




BIRTHDAY THOUGHTS

I would lay in bed in my warm pajamas
We usually needed permission to get out of bed
I'd  s-t-r-e-t-c-h  and wonder what presents
I'd get.

I asked for things I never did get:
a chemistry set and Lincoln Logs
once I got a red record player
that played 45s, 78s, and LPs

It came with a filler so you could
play 45s.

My mind is being stretched as parts
of my brain I never use is tingling
like a French kiss

And of course I believed in Santa
and God and that I'd live forever.





The Paul Taylor Dance Company

 Caramel Cake
Vegetarian Butternut Squash







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