Angie the Homeless Woman

Walked out the front door and the sweet smells of sap, where Scott's treecutters had taken down three trees, one a huge fir tree on his front lawn, confronted me.

A sign for Sam Valenza, running for re-election for township commissioner, was on my lawn, with my permission.

Drove over to Giant. I always go in the back way, where the PeaPod trucks are (home delivery).

A very heavy woman put up her hand to stop me.

Later I told this story to Matt, my physical therapist, who is helping me with my balance and bad left arm from strapping myself into my seat.

I put on my flashers, asked the woman what was wrong, and told her I'd return.

Well, of course the person I mentioned it to, said he'd tell his boss, which made no difference.

I did my own shopping, desperately needed salad greens, which I just had for breakfast, atop of which was scrambled eggs, mushrooms, and onions.

Then I told Angie, which I learned was the woman's name, that I'd take her shopping and she could buy what she needed.

Where dyou live? I asked.

In a group home, she answered. No, she didn't know how many people lived with her.

She had no energy, she said, and needed some caffeinated soda.

I bought her two-six packs of something, can't remember now.

She had a terrible headache so needed Tylenol.

We'll get the generic brand, I suggested.

She selected a huge white bottle that looked like it would drill a hole in your stomach.

BTW, I'm drinking the last of Coach Iris's Pumpkin Spice Coffee, still delicious after THREE years.

Altho Angie didn't have a list, she knew exactly what she wanted.

When we walked in the store, Halloween candy was spread out. She quickly grabbed a bag of Snickers and other chocolates.

They're two for one, she said.

I was furious and felt like smacking her.

Apple cider. I put two half gallon jugs in her cart.

Spice cookies - ya want these? They were Ivins spice cookies.

Can I have two? she asked.

No, I said.

Everything she saw, she wanted two of them.

I probly mumbled something about being grateful...

She needed a pound of ground coffee.

Look, I said, How's this? It was pumpkin spice.

We walked on, me in my blue hair, and Angie in what looked to be bedroom slippers.

When I decided to buy her groceries she assured me she wasn't no drug addict.

She had some sort of white foam oozing from the corners of her mouth and I told her to wipe them.

We checked out. Total bill was $60.

She asked me if she could sit down - she probly weighed 350 lbs - and if she could start drinking her soda.

No, you can't, I said. You should learn restraint and utilize will power.

Earlier I had met the asst store manager, introduced him to Angie, who was homeless, and asked if he would pay for a cab for her group home.

No problem, he said, and DID.

She had wanted me to drive her home, but as the Old Testament says, "Thus far and no further."