Friday, December 12, 2008

The Mayor of Willow Grove Mall

I'm always late for Mornings at the Mall. That's cuz I know either Helen or Marion will be sitting there & either greeting the Mallsters or doing their own thing if no one shows up. (My own dread fear of abandonment.) When I walked into the mall yesterday, I braced myself for an empty table. I had come prepared w/2 library books - the extraordinary Searching for Schindler by the Australian who wrote Schindler's List made famous by the movie, & another book by a woman who won a prize that kept her in handbags and jewelry until she completed the book.

First I glanced at Fred's table which I call The Sexy Old Men's Table. I've gotta avoid them cuz they're really interesting & have an opinion about everything. They meet daily. Someone should write a newspaper article on them - or about us.

Our table was packed! Sitting at the end was The Dysfunctional Family of the Year. As soon as I sat down the 3 of em wanted to talk to me. They look for a saviour to solve their multitudinous problems that grow at an exponential rate. Just cuz I was born on Xmas Day doesn't mean I'm IT. The kid starts talking. Then the other kid. They all talk at the same time. It actually reminds me of my own family when I was growing up. You could not finish a sentence. No one gave a darn about what the other person said b/c one's own needs were forever insolvable!

This was a very needy family. They'd spoken their peace to Helen - who is VERY GOOD! - but now they needed to say the same thing AGAIN to the alleged head of the group. I used to like helping them b/c I THOUGHT I COULD DO SOME GOOD. The family has been in professional therapy their whole life.

I made a brilliant intervention that I knew would change the entire course of their family history and put them on the fast track toward success, maybe even making them future candidates for - well, let's say the gubernatorial race of Illinois.

Stop right there, says I. You keep looking at one another while you're answering my questions. You people can't think for yourselves. Aaron! I'm talking to you and I want you to look straight at me and not check with your girlfriend.

And, silly me, actually thinks this is gonna sink in.

Okay, on to the next victim. A new girl named Sandy. She turns out to be far more depressed than you'd ever know. She has suicidal thoughts when driving. Ya know, drive over the cliff, drive off the bridge, how bout ramming that tractor trailer & showing who's boss? I say this lightly, with humor, b/c you can't deal with heavy stuff like this by letting yourself feel their true pain. I myself have felt their true pain - as has the entire Mall table at one time or another - but once you're out of that deep pit, you can't allow yourself to be lowered back down.

I say to her - and reiterate it this morning on the phone - Those thoughts are gonna come. They are very strong, very intense, but they are tricking you. You are smarter than they are & you've gotta toss them aside by saying something positive or shouting outloud. Yes, you are smarter than those thoughts.

I also have Sandy make out 2 affirmation cards. The first is: I will not kill myself. The second is How to get out of bed in the morning.

Okay, on to pleasanter things. Like what? Oh! The Mayor of the Mall. I nearly forgot.

So, we've got one shift of Mallsters & then Shelly Quigley walks by. She's an entertainer & sits down with us. At 5-minute intervals she jumps up to hug someone she knows. "I feel like the Mayor of the Willow Grove Mall," she says. Shelly will be joining us on Sunday at our Coffeeshop Gig! Check the website for her tagline. We're also visiting her brother, who lives in a group home, the week before Xmas.

Another featured guest is Claudia Beechman, an old friend & an immensely talented woman. Her sister Laurie was an actress and singer on Broadway before she died at age 44 of ovarian cancer. When speaking w/Claude last nite, she told me of Laurie's breathtaking performances available by the miracle of YouTube. Before I went to bed last nite I sat at my computer beguiled by these 2 videos. Click one. Click two. These are appearances she & her husband made on the Phil Donohue Show. Laurie was in Cats, Annie, & Joseph and the Technicolor Dream Machine, among other shows. Immense talents like hers are rarely seen. Like the sun in our galaxy. She pulled me in!

When I see Claudia on Sunday I'll tell her that Claudia herself has a very similar voice to Laurie who was trained as a child as a singer. Claudia's voice is as powerful as her sister's and also as expressive. You will LOVE HER!

And of course Pam London Barrett will be there dispensing free prescriptions for Abilify to anyone who wants it. When o when Pamela are you gonna have your own practice, we all want to know. She's currently practicing at Norristown State Hospital.

Brrrring! Ah, there's the phone above the soothing noise of the dishwasher. Don't you love the sounds of your home machines? Sometimes I lie in bed and listen to my refrigerator make ice. I lived w/o ice for nearly 2 years cuz I was too cheap to get the icemaker fixed. Now I'm in love again - with ice!