Interview with BBR as I walk up n down Cowbell - Honoring Tracey and Linda - The amazing brain

who dis? Oh, c'est moi on the cover of our 2004 Compass. Larry Kirschner took the foto outside Norristown State Hospital. Carl Yeager did the photo realization.

I was incarcerated in then-Bldg 16 for the three worst days of my life beginning February 14, 1984.

I was bullied by hospital aide Howard - a psycho - b/c I was utterly defenseless and could not think. I was shot up insensate with Haldol.

I tell my story in my book Yes I Can, Conquering Bipolar Disorder and Depression.

Some of my story I related to freelancer Judy Schwartz who'll write me up for a BBR e-Newsletter.

I volunteered to share my story of recovery. I also emphasized the great teamwork at New Directions and how we all work hard to get the best of care for every single member who comes our way.

The Brain and Behavior Foundation is one of the most important research organizations in the world. It funds scientists who do groundbreaking research in understanding the various mental health conditions, resulting in better treatment for us, and the ultimate victory: a cure.

We all wanna know: How did I get cured? Can it happen to others?

As a reporter myself, I thought Judy asked good questions. She was speaking from her apartment in NYC, while I was walking up n down Cowbell Road, while cars were whooshing by, kicking up dust from our newly milled street, as yet unpaved.

 I've been aware of BBR, formerly NARSAD, for many years. In 1999, we had a really creative program in which we donated funds to NARSAD, as we often do.

Knowing that we were having a guest speaker at New Directions last nite, I went over to Barnes and Noble to buy her a gift.

Parked my car at the library and walked the 5 minutes to B&N, thinking all the way down. Yes, that's it, I said. I'll give Tracey a gift card.

When I walked in, I thought, no, why don't I get her some sort of psychology book.

They all looked so boring! Here's the one I studied at grad school:

I just ate that book up. Every page was so meaningful.

This reminds me of a young client I have. "David" said to me he often thinks about death and wonders what the purpose of life is.

"David," I said from my red couch, "you should be thinking about these things. When we're young we should question everything. Especially, Why am I here? What's life all about?"

David was shocked to hear me say these things. I validated his thoughts which had frightened him.

Ah, Sartre! Simone deBeauvoir! Ionesco! Andre Gide! I read all these books and more when I was his age.

While staring at the imposing rows of boring psychology books, a thought ran through my brain:

 VIRGINIA WOOLF: One of my favorite writers. So I bought MRS DALLOWAY and

TO THE LIGHTHOUSE.  How could I possibly choose between these darlings.

Here's Va Woolf, who I'm not afraid of, are you?

Virginia Woolf: 1882 – 1941

She suffered from moodswings and voices, but it never inhibited her prodigious creativity.

I endorsed copies of the books for our guest speaker Tracey and also for Linda. Both women recently received their certifications as Certified Peer Specialists.....peers helping peers thru the rigors of mental health challenges.

But who is gonna help Mitt Romney?

I never tire of hearing his of gaffes.

One helluva gorgeous car driving by.

After the New Directions meeting, I send an email to all the members of our group encouraging them and also listing the name of a new psychiatrist one of our women must see.

People cling to their old incompetent doctors. What's that about?

Finally, I collapse into bed. Exhausted. I can't even read The Looming Tower.

Uh-oh! I lie there for five seconds and get my second wind.

First, I concentrate on how great it feels to lie in my comfy bed. I relax and feel the presence of my entire body that goes with me wherever I go.

There is not one single pain in this aging body of mine. How blessed am I!

I fall into a fitful sleep, waking and reading, then falling back.

I make one more attempt to read our Book Club Book - it's by a Turk who won the Nobel Prize for his body of work. "The New Life" is incomprehensible to me. I read the last couple pages. I must say, tho, that the last sentence was terrific!

What shall I do? Shall I go to the book discussion group? I like all the people.

I'm awakened around 4 pm by a song, "The Fool on the Hill."

My goodness, I think. I haven't heard this in forty or more years.

I think of our almighty brains. My brain, 66 and a half years old, remembers this old Beatles song.

Okay, I'm outa here. Chief Nestel said there's a woman in her car and doesn't know where she is. I'm gonna go look for her.

Scuse me.

Many local people went out searching for her.

Chief Nestel just updated the situation:

Hi Ruth Deming,
A street by street search of the Willow Grove area resulted in the discovery of the woman who was in medical distress. She was in the green Suzuki in the parking lot of the Willow Grove Mall. She is being transported to AMH for emergency medical treatment. Thank you for your help.

Chief Thomas Nestel