PREPARING FOR SURGERY / Poems: Wawa in the a.m. - My Kingdom for a Daylily (they're out now)

Nice long visit w/Grace and family this morning. She goes right for the steps. That girl is quick!

All's I wanna do after surgery is be able to walk around the block. It's been two years since I said hello to neighbors at the top or bottom of the street.

Two days ago, my back felt well enough to walk past four houses, then cross the street, and walk the four houses home.

Little victories.

Today I had a big victory. Three friends and I, plus Ellie the spaniel, walked the Pennypack Spur, a shady, canopied path hard by the Pennypack Creek which glistened and beckoned off to the side.

Ellie took a delightful dip or two, shaking herself off.

I was streaming with sweat. The body's way of cooling itself. My entire head was wet. When I was on lithium, I didn't sweat.

During this walk, I constantly monitored myself: how's my blood sugar? am I high or low? I had eaten a good healthy meal prior to the walk

Chicken stew w/loads of veggies, seasoned w/bay leaves and cinnamon. A container of organic cherry tomatoes contributed to the delicious broth.

People w/diabetes must plan ahead. I get all these links about diabetes daredevils who climb mountains, race in marathons, go skydiving.

All I want to do is go for a walk. I felt a tiny wave of panic as I walked the path, thinking What if I get a lo-blood sugar attack. My glucose tabs were in the car.

You'll make it, I reassured myself.

I believe we must've walked nearly two miles.

I'm so proud of myself I said to Amy, who's head of some vaccine department at Merck.

So the idea is to build up my body for surgery. Lose some weight.

Okay, okay. Sometimes I need some nice chocolate and peanuts to roll around in my mouth.

When you get these peanut clusters in the bin, they cost all of 16 cents for two.

I usually eat treats on the way home from the store - my father forbad us to eat in the car - but I remembered I had cold milk at home, and what could be better than that.

Was going thru my stacks n stacks of poems and found a couple of nice ones. I think they were written around 2003.

WAWA IN THE A.M.

Quick, before the cars are on the road
Before the sun announces itself
from behind Charlie's dogwood

Quick, pull on your jeans and blue pancho
Sarah has bought from Saks Fifth Avenue
for my twenty-ninth birthday though
really I am fifty-eight

Then, go, child, out to the car
It will be frozen and the door will
click open with a little tug
and dusts of ice will fly off the door

Driving to the Wawa, we call it "the Wah"
round these parts
they are there already though the sun's
not even up, I watch for them
crowds already though I believe the
digital clock in the car read something like
6:49, don't know if it's right or not,
don't know which of my seventeen clocks
to believe any more
not important since I always arrive
early and like to wait around for all
the great events

They are massed around the Coffee Island
I'd never tried their coffee
oh, perhaps long ago before they had the
fancy flavors
the men in the trucks love the coffee
wish I could sit with them in their front seats
with coffee of my own
feeling the warmth through the thick sturdy cup
taking tiny sips so's not to burn my tongue

God, I was depressed this morning
Dan had drunk the last of the orange juice
I'd come for that. And that alone.
Saw the Mac machine and figured I'd pull out
two hundred dollars to pay for my orange juice
and other things at other times, mostly gasoline
and an occasional doughnut

They have two machines, such is the popularity
of money,
two machines: the one that works
and the one you have to work at
pushing buttons and repushing buttons
to make it work
I chose the shorter path and placed the
twenties into my wallet
then picked a clean-looking plastic bottle
of OJ with black tab sealed,
the color alone is enough to knock you
off your feet and down onto the floor,
told them No bag, please,
and sat in the front seat with the glass
I'd brought from home
watching the sun come up
and drinking.

MY KINGDOM FOR A DAYLILY

Have you seen them by the side of the road?
God's calm heralds of a summer day?

Their time is now,
as is yours,
with the shortening of the days.

Let us with our soft hands
Caress their outward vanity
Brush their orangerie against our cheek
Then take the plunge down their
narrowing chamber.

Only to come up
kissed by the stars.


+

I'll load the other three hundred slowly by slowly.